Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in murderislove666's LiveJournal:

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Tuesday, January 23rd, 2007
10:39 pm	Shit life sucks right now me n john broke up yeah it sucks i still love him so fuckin much but he heard i cheated on him i tried dating once after it dident feel right so i called that off and i feel bad for making him upset hes awesome and i still like him i just cant date yet. apparently im a whore too cause i hungout with Genovesi and dident fuck him its shocking apparently. THANKS ASSHOLE. cause thats always nice to hear. everythings my damn fault latley. im trying not to cry but its not working. im a fuckup! thats all -Sid i lost 10 pounds. shockingly. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Saturday, November 18th, 2006
10:06 pm	uhhh Cold? well today was boring really, went to windsor wanted to hangout with John but his dads an ass, but ohwell, hopefully tomorrow i can. but i have to wait till after 5 ummmm i unno i got a job at Applebees its shit as all hell if i dont get to chill with John tomorrow than drunkness with pat WOOOO gah i feel sick too much caffine and sugar wow not much is new really monday is me n Johns 5 months holy shit eh yeah well ummmm......not much is new at all work school and drinking woo?? and its fucking cold im freezing my ass off. <3 thats about all i have to say -Sid Current Mood: hyper and cold. (Comment on this)
Wednesday, September 27th, 2006
11:07 pm	oh fuck okay well today was a relativly good day. went to school happy cause yesterday John came over math sucked but no h/w so im happy parenting just a lame boring video lunch sat out on the bleachers anthro was alright made some funny comics art actually worked a little not much just a little got home chilled talked to john n stuff went to matts to watch a movie that was fun, but he kissed me :S sick movie though Running Scared i suggest it um came home called John than i went to get my phone and what a shock my parents are at it again fighting that is. i dident see it comming though i wish they dident act so happy around me it pisses me off. but yeah. i unno i cant wait till Friday drunkness with John Robbie and Garnett. should be funn, Jackass 2 yeaup well i cant sleep so i wrote out my day i miss John alot right now. well he prolly wont read this buuut I FUCKING LOVE YOU! I LOVE JOHNATHON PATRIC WILLIAM LADD! more than the goddamn world. xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo ♥ -Sid forever and always your love. Current Mood: kinda shitty actually (Comment on this)
Thursday, August 24th, 2006
10:54 pm	happy fuckin birthday okay so from like 9-5 SUCKED.minus lunch, lunch was good, Jason picked me up went to Hooters, woot, and they made me dance and thought i was 19 ohwell, and listened to some rap cause its cool, but than i got home got bitched at and cried. i hate crying. people are jerks. Hotknife keeps bitching cause they play first. their playing first CAUSE THEY FUCKIN SUCK. be happy your playing like fuck off. were dumpin $800 into this show. fuck off and appreciate how much work it takes and that your even playing, if we play i dont care what slot we have aslong as were getting ourselves out there and having fun. fuck it. ohwell, than bree was bitching at me. than i had a beer calmed down, than at like 5:30 John came over i miss him already i was so happy sleeping over at Alycia's Sunday-monday so that should be good. hopefully get drunk me n john will fuck fer sure either of those either at the bridge or at the show or both man id be so happy i love him so much and since im tired imma stop typing ugh people keep hitting on me "when you n john break up we should fuck" like screw off im NOT a whore leave me alone -SID ♥ Happy Fuckin Birthday Slut your 16 and it sucked. Current Mood: decent i suppose (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, August 16th, 2006
12:40 am	Fucking People alright well i had nothing against her but fucking hell fucking cokehead cheating whore, she has the right to call me a whore im not the one who sleeps around, dose coke and E, shes just pissed cause im dating someone she fucked over, its not my fault shes a whore. i dont sleep with 29 yr olds, im not the fucking coke addict, so what im dating John, you cheated YOUR fault you fucking skank. im PROUD i dont fucking sleep around. im tired of people talking about me behind my back. i didnet do anything to her. but what the hell, im not gonna start anything but if she starts something i WILL finish it. she may have a few people on her side but i dont give a shit. im not going to take it. im not a whore i stick to ONE person at a time. fucking skank. it just bothers me that she talks about him behind his back and me behind mine. i dident do anything nor did he. he dumped her. FOR A GOOD REASON. no need to be a cunt to him cause of it, you wanted to sleep around your choice. I find him attractive i dont give a shit if she dose or not, KEEP YOUR OPINION TO YOURSELF, you think im a whore FINE, im not the one that fucked 30 or more people. i think im done being a bitch but im pissed at that -Sid never mind it isent outta my system yet BETH YOU FUCKING CUNT WHORE. i hope you go get fucked up on your coke and get aids. Current Mood: Fuckin Pissed (Comment on this)
Tuesday, July 4th, 2006
11:10 pm	OH MY FUCK! wow..im stupid i dident even update about my bands show *DUR!* oh my god it was amazing. we were up first we did good. like i got complimented. it pissed me off how bree took all the credit for the show though even though she only rented the place out. i got the bands, sound equipt. got the bands to come at the right time, figured out the time slots, kept things organized etc. ohwell. it was great. Steve liked my vocals, we sounded good so im told. haha i spent all the time with John which is amazing. i like that boy so so much. im falling for him i really am. he just gives me this feeling...its unexplainable i dont know. but its great. yeah we hungout for the whole show pretty much. than today he biked down. it was an amazing day. id go through what happened but people dont need to hear that. but it was fun. we watched TV, then went for a walk, got baked, went to the store, watched more TV, my mom made me kick him out *tear*, cause he gave me a hickey *rolls eyes* but she isent pissed or anything which is cool. but meh ohwell. it was an amazing day...i really like him alot i do i do...well yeah...and i might miss funfest cause i might be at my grandma's watching her house =\ ohwell. it'll suck but my cousin said she'd come visit me and if shes going i'll go with her. yeah. but hmm...yeah i had an amazing day today. im so happy. its bad cause now he's all i think about pretty much *blush*. *sigh*. well im tired its late and im really lazy and dont want to type anymore. so goodnight ♥ -Sid ps. my aunts new puppies are the cutest things ever! Current Mood: Amazing to no end. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Saturday, June 24th, 2006
11:19 pm	Laser Tag Is Fun hahahaha alright. well Adam, Jason and I were gonna go to Leftover Crack, Against All Authority tonight. but it was in a bad neighbourhood in Detroit. so we said fuck that. so we were gonna go Laser Tagging, i called John asked if he wannted to go, so we went to 1214, than went to pick him up. we were driving and some girl had the "Jesus" fish on the back of her car. than at a stoplight we noticed her liscence plate "MonkeyCab" were like Jesus Fish Monkey Cab what? haha yeah so we got to the family fun centre. OH MY GOD! Adam and Jason SUCK at DDR, like its funny as hell. i was laughing so hard, me n John were just cracking up hardcore. so than we were just chillin untill Jordan, and Corey got there. and then we got our tickets for laser tag, waited to go in. John and I only did one game as Adam, Jason, Jordan and Corey did 2. but yeah we got our asses kicked haha. yeah. we suck. but than we chilled while the others went into their games. sigh i like him so much. we were cuddling in the seat, than the others second game was done, John called his mom said he had to be home by 10. so we left at like 9:40, brought him home, i got out to give him a hug and he was like "where are you going, i was like to hug you goodbye" than we hugged and kissed goodbye,than i got back in the car and we went back to Essex, got timmies. oh god that was soooo funny. i had an icecap, adam had a strawberry tart thing, jason had a milk and coughnut, after we collected all our garbage and were making like sculptures of it. and we ended up with "VAGINA BOT 6000!" haha its sooo funny. cause we had the lid of the icecap (which looks like a vagina) as a head, milk carton as a torso, and the icecap cup as the legs. we put the staws through the milk carton as arms, haha and there was a napkin over one and i made handcuffs out of another napkin and put it on the other straw, haha its sooooo funny. we drew on eyes, and put a napkin in its mouth so it looks like its vomitting. oh god. i was sooooo funny. well yeah....now thats my night and im tired and this is the longest thing iv written in a while i think im gonna go read for a bit than pass the FUCK out. goodnight :) haha ashley your gonna laugh sooo hard. yeah. i wish i had a camera for that haha. -Sid ♥ Current Mood: Fricken Amazing. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
12:09 am	IM GOING TO POISON AND FUCKING CINDERELLA!!! August 1st. I CANT WAIT!!! ahhh!!! me n John are going. his parents are gonna drive us there, drop us off, than pick us up when its done. its gonna be sooooo awesome. like fuck me its gonna be so sweet. its in TORONTO! AHH! im gonna be so tired after. but its gonna be soooo funn. haha today i talked to john for like 8 hours on the phone and he was playing guitar...oh my god i was biting my lip. haha ashley knows what im talking about....hes better than Nich. i was like *drool* i told him that its soooo hot when guys/girls play guitar. its like like AHHH! fuck i cant wait. im hopefully hanging out with him Wednsday, Thursday (i know i am) and than Friday hopefully. Hopefully...and than if he can get a ride to essex imma bring him to titus-a-thon, and in the morning and by morning i mean around 5pm imma make food. i cant wait i like him soooo much. :) :)...but yeah i cant wait and its like 12:12am and im tired not much has happened really so im gonna sleep. peaceout. -Sid ♥ oh ash...look at my boyfriends body: And he took that when he was drunk...not bad eh? hehe ♥ Current Mood: pretty mofoin good. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, June 21st, 2006
5:18 pm	i know ashley will wanna hear about this sooo, okay lastnight me n John talked for a while cause we always do, and then we were on msn and the phone and we were talking about randomness, and then he had to go and he asked if we were dating...long story behind that. but yeah i was like "i unno are we" and he was like "well i'd like to :)" so i was like "me too" and then he got offline cause his rents were yelling at him he was like "peace n love byee" than i got all Giddy and went downstairs to watch When A Stranger Calls. with my mom and sisteeeeer. and friday imma go to the mall n chill with John maybe get drunk but thats cool hehe. than next week is my bands show yayyy! and i soooo cant wait for August. ooooh my fuck its gonna be good. im goin to not one..but TWO house partys. one at johns (hahaha i know what ashleys thinking and i hope to god it happens) and then one at his friend Kieth's John is taking me. haha its gonna be sweet. yeahhh. i cant wait till our bands show me n John are gonna be trashed, we gonna go for a walk and imma rape him...haha no but i wish. well yeah thats enough for now. and ashley heres a pic of john for you. Current Mood: Amazzzzing. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Saturday, June 17th, 2006
10:03 am	well i am now over shawn :D probably cause i havent talked/seen him in like a month. but still. im happy :D and i think imma dump Andy cause i never see him. i wont see him for atleast another week, and then i'll prolly be going to alberta with my sister for about a month. so it just wont work. i miss him and i like him alot i do, but i think i wanna wait a bit till we can see eachother more easy :) but yeah lastnight was cool. got wasted. Current Mood: good but really hot (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, June 12th, 2006
12:21 am	Hmmm okay so its like 12:30am just got done watching Grandma's Boy. fucking funny as all hell. yeah so hmm i might go to the movies with John wednsday. which is cool. Andy gah i like him so much but him living in LaSalle is a bitch. so i unno. i dont think it'll go very long cause windsor i can do yeah. but laSalle is sooo hard. cause its like 40mins away from Essex. so i unno. i like him alot yeah. but i unno. i also like John *kicks self in ass* god i hate me. but i mean me n him have more in common than andy andi. like me and john both listen/love old school metal, and we both love booze n such and he also admits loving Spice Girls haha. and i can keep a convo with him going for sooooo long. i unno. but he just got outta 2 year relationship. so i unno but yeah haha. but i unno. im fuckin tired right now and mat is pissing me off to no end. AH! fuckin ah! but yeah i unno. i think i might go to bed soon. i need sleep....badly. today ihad 4 cans of pop and icecream and some sour watermelons so im still kinda sugar/caffine high...ahh. so yeah this week should be pretty cool. yeahhh. -Sid g'night. Current Mood: Confuzzled. god i hate boys. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Saturday, June 10th, 2006
9:16 am	Wooow so the past week has been cool. tuesday (6.6.6) i went and saw The Omen, with Andy, Bree and Katie. mitch dosent know cause he'd go insane. but then me n Andy hungout AGAIN yesterday. again he dosent know he'd have a cow. but yeah it was funn. during the Omen christ i have never been so turned on in my life haha. and then yesterday i was there for like 20mins maybe, then i saw andy, evan and dave, they were goin to the bathroom i was going outside with bree cause she wanted a smoke, they said they would meet us outside. so went outside chilled talked to people you know just hungout then after the smoke I had to go pee so we went back inside saw andy n them again so we walked back to the food cort they waited at a table as i went pee, then i came out they were like im hungry so i bought them fries. cause im too nice so then we walked aroud n shit, went to timmys, met up with Jason n chilled. went to chapters played hackysac got told not to etc. then walked around sat in chapters for a while, went to MusicWorld, walked around again lawl talked with people i know, hungout, then Jason got food, and they decided they were leaving in half hour, which made me sad cause i dident want them to leave...assholes haha. not really. but meh. i was still all awwwe i dun want you to leave. so we waited at the bus stop, i talked to andy n hungout, i asked him out...kinda lawl but he said yes :) :) then they had to go :( so then i found bree went inside to go pee again, met 2 girls, they were 14 i think. the one was fricken hot. but meh, then i went pee and saw kim on my way back. she wanted to see bree/bree wanted to seeher so i told her to come with me, and i got bree and was like "look who i found" and bree was like huh who? i pointed and was like "kim" and bree like screamed and was all AHHHH!!!! so yeah that was cool too, i talked to Nikky, and a few other people. just chilled around. i talked to John for the first time. Johns cool. i got hit student card and foundout why him n Beth broke up. its sad :( but yeah iv always thought he would be fuckin sweet, like hes a nice guy which is funny cause most people wouldent think he is. but he is. and yeah talked to him for like an hour n a half, got his e-mail then i had to leave, so we hugged goodbye and hopefully i'll talk to him today. at my bands show me n him are gonna drink. it'll be cool. so yeah that was lastnight. :D Current Mood: Gooooood!! Great! Fantastic! (Comment on this)
Sunday, June 4th, 2006
10:45 am	okay so yeah. matt obviously dumped me cause hes confusing as hell. so i feel like shit. i went to the strawberryfest last night. and chilled with Andy, Mike, Gui, Jason and Mitch. and it was cool just chilled hit in tents from the rain, ate candy, just chilled. ate pizza. it was cool. andy got drunk and kissed me. mitch hates me now. i feel like shit. i started cutting again. which isent good. but it helps. i stopped crying for the first time in a good hour. i feel like shit. i hate hurting people. i like Andy yeah i do. and i love Mitch. yeah. im just confused as all hell right now. all hell. im bleeding like a mofo i cut real deep by accident but i really dont care. i feel like shit. i have toilet paper jammed up my nose, i have toilet paper on my legs to help the bleeding, im crying like a fool, my eyeliner is running. iv been so confused the past month but iv never been happier. untill today. cause i feel like a bitch to the max. and he still loves me...he shouldent. he really shouldent. Current Mood: Upset As All Hell. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Sunday, May 28th, 2006
6:20 pm	okay so today was random. woke up, mom told me my grandma is in the hospital, mild heartattack should be out in about a week or so, went on msn talked to people mitch called me i made food, went back on msn, had a nap around 12-3, went back on msn talked to Andy. andy is cool i like andy like i wish he dident live in lasalle. fuckin lasalle. but then i did dishes, went back on msn talked to Matt, who asked me out randomly i said yes so now im dating someone. i like matt, and he only lives in windsor so its cool. i wish andy lived closer i like him too. were supposed to hangout next weekend :) if we do it'll be cool. i'll be drunk but it'll be cool haha. but yeah i dont know what else to put....lalalala. OH! and i have a mohawk now. yay? its awesome i love it. my sister forgot to buy me hairspray yesterday though :( damn her!!!! but ohwell. i can use all of hers :D and i have new stalkings woot woot :D Current Mood: im insannnne! (Comment on this)
Saturday, May 20th, 2006
12:34 pm	okay so i feel really alone...i hungout with shawn yesterday...and its just sooo confusing!!! i dont know anymore...everytime we hangout and were alone its just so intimate. like old times. and then we get in public and its just so different. we hugged before we went opposite ways and he kissed me on the top of the head i kissed him on the cheek hugged again and walked away. i almost started crying....i really did...and now im crying again... the sayings true....you dont know what you have untill its gone....and then i read this...its sad. Kiss on lips = I love you Kiss on nose = your special Kiss on ear = I adore you Kiss on shoulder = your mine Kiss on cheek = friendship Kiss on fore head = comfort Kiss anywhere else = be carefull Smiling at eachother = I like you Staring = your cute or pretty Looking at each other = I like you Holding hands = happiness Hugs = they care Slap on da ass = interested Arm around the waist = i need you Breathing in your ear = warming up Raising eyebrows = flirting Looking around = hide`n there feelings Squeeze on hand = dont leave Tear drop = im losing you Crying = i lost you and i lost him. i miss him. i want him. i need him. why am i such a fuckup?? why? Current Mood: Confused...Sad...Everything. (Comment on this)
Thursday, May 18th, 2006
6:21 pm	so iv been feeling a little sick lately. and im supposed to get a shot tuesday....FUCK THAT! i have a math test tomorrow do you smell failing? i do. fuck. i need to pass this fucking class. atleast i need to get a LITTLE better then fucking 32ish. tomorrow im going well hopefully going to hangout with Matt. so i'll prolly be hangingout with him from about 4-11ish which i dont mind really. hes a cool guy. so it should be pretty spiffy. might get drunk. might not. depends i suppose. im actually thinking about quitting drinking....maybe. but yeah it should be some fun shit. haha. i unno if were gonna go back to his house or whats gonna happen. but ohwell. i just hope i dont end up sitting outside all fuckin night. id be pissed. and monday Nick might come pick me up get some beer and i'll get wasted with him sunday/monday and he'd drive me home monday. haha its funny how i said i might stop drinking yet i might get trashed outta my face this weekend. ohwell. whatta expect. DRUNK PUNKS!!! i also wanna hangout with Shawn this weekend. cause i miss him. but i think if i hangout with matt more it might help me get over shawn. haha. the actual meaning of that statement that only ashley will get. but yeah. so not much new. math teacher left again after being here for a month. stupid cow. and so we have a dumbass science teacher teaching us. yay. not. and iv been more tired then usual blech. it sucks quite a bit. hmmmm...its may 24 weekend and im doing next to nothing. lame much? yeah. i think so. but yeah i might add on later if i have more to say. peaceeee. Current Mood: Tired as Hellllll (Comment on this)
Sunday, May 14th, 2006
10:22 pm	AHHHHHHHHHHH! okay so im fucking alwibgljgqegl! shawn asked me today if theres any new guys. i told him no. and i dident really realize why untill now...i dont want to. i dont want to date anyone unless its shawn. yeah i know. its a stupid thing to do, but i cant help it. i really cant it just feels wrong to be with anyone else. and i dont deserve to even be friends with Shawn still. i just wish there was a second chance. iv spent the past 2-4 hours crying or trying not to because i cant stop thinking about him. i found the pic of him and me in my drawer today and how hard i cried. i miss him so much. I FUCKING MISS HIM! the thought of him with another girl just kills me. i wish it wasent like that because i dont want to hold him back from being happy...its been what 5 months and both of us are still upset. its so horrible. i want to be with him so so bad...i really do. and i wanted to tell him that today but i couldent. i couldent bring myself to tell him that. but things are going back kinda to like they used to be. except i cry alot. and he just sits there not talking while i cry just so i know he's there and im not alone. and i just fuck i miss him so goddamn much....why am i such a fuck up?? why?! i just i dont deserve to even talk to him anymore. but i have that advantage. and i just i fuck. i miss him and if i could only go back in time. i mean friday we hugged and i dident want to go. and it seemed like time froze. at the moment. it really felt like time froze. and he noticed it too. i wish i could just hold on to him forever. i feel so safe in his arms. like nothing can go wrong. like everything iv done and everything thats happened dosent matter anymore. like everything at that moment is perfect. and every moment i spend with him is like that. and i just wish i dident fuck it up in the first place. well....im gonna go cry myself to sleep. -Sid I Miss Moments Like This.... (Comment on this)
Monday, March 27th, 2006
7:03 pm	last night was AMAZING. i went to the movies with my sister, kyle, and Shawn. me n shawn went n saw Failier To Launch. it was cute. i only payed attention to like half. the other half i was half asleep/kissing. yeah...i kissed him and it felt so right. fuck i miss him so much....there was alot of kissing/holding/other things. it was so great. i dont know if its going anywhere or if it was just a spurr of the moment thing. so im confused. because i love him i do. and i know i fucked up. but if i could have a second chance. never. i would NEVER fuck it up. Sean shawns best friend is a jerk. i put a comment on one of shawns pics and he put "heyyyyy.... lovely you know that thing cheated on you.. whatta slut face lol thats one more time *points down* " above my comment. i started crying. i mean shure he can bash me. but its not his buisness the fuck ups iv done. or anyone elses buisness except for me and shawn. and he had no right to put that publicly because it has nothing to do with him. i know he's trying to look out for shawn. but its not his life. and i know i fucked up. and sean dosent want him to get hurt again. and he thinks if he dates me again he will get hurt. but i would never hurt him again never. i mean fuck. its been like 3 months since and im still upset. well i think thats all for today. ♥ -SlutFace. oh and now my "best" friend i read put this about me "sydney tried to tell em today that fi it weren't for gramma's stupid rule she'd be able to go too, frankly, i just dont' see it. syd lives off crack change and she's supposed to get almost 150$ just to go there and back that she has of her own money? why the fuck is she always complaining she has no money if she has this all stashed away somewhere?" yeah you know what im sorry i dont have much money. and for your info i do have money in the bank. my familys money issues arent your problem. i cant take it out of the bank because i know nothing about my account. i mean first sean puts me n shawns problems in public in where its not his life he has no right to do that. and then i read that. i mean is it just me or do i have a right to be pissed?? Current Mood: Upset. and pretty Pissed. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, March 20th, 2006
10:14 pm	wow...i never knew how much i actually miss me n shawn being together untill today. he was on webcam playing guitar and i was just looking going "wow...i miss you so much" and i started crying, and i still hate myself so much for what happened. and so i called him we talked fer a while. and on our conversation on msn he told me to write down words of how i feel like negitive things and then throw them out. and when we were on the phone he told me to write his name down...but i just cant bring myself to do it. i really cant. i just....i love him. and i know i shouldent but i cant help it. and i would do ANYTHING for a second chance. i dont deserve it though. but hell. i just i cant get over him. i cant. its been what 2 months and i still cant. hes in my mind all the time, no matter what im doing i think of him. and i think of how much i hate myself for fucking it up because i put him in pain, and i miss us so much. i cant wait to see him again because i really want to give him those items. in which i hope he likes...i promised him i wouldent cut anymore. and i dont intend to. because i dont like breaking promise's and if i think i will i dont make them. but for him i think i can do it(not cut), because when i think of him i get all these emotions, theres happy, sad, hyper, giggly, guilty, just so many, but i mean...i just...well i love him. and i just cant seem to let him go and i think thats why. because i love him, hes always in my mind, hes the only guy that can make me laugh when im crying, i just cant shake the feeling of hate in myself for ruining it. but i dont know. if only i could go back in time. i would change that one thing. and he told me he still has feelings for me which made me feel both good and bad. i hurt him and thats the last thing i ever wanted to do to him. and i mean...i dont know. im gonna take lyrics from the song "Because You Loved Me" and put them here because its how i feel. For all those times you stood by me For all the truth that you made me see For all the joy you brought to my life For all wrong that you made right For every dream you made come true For all the love I found in you I'll be forever thankful baby Your the one that held me up Never let me fall Your the one who saw me through, through it all You were my strength when I was weak You were my voice when I couldn't speak You were my eyes when I couldn't see You saw the best there was in me Lifed me up when I couldn't reach You gave me faith 'cause you believed Im everything I am beause you loved me You gave me wings and made me fly You touched my hand, I could touch the sky I lost my faith, you gave it back to me You said no star as out of of reach You stood by me and I stood tall I had your love, I had it all I'm grateful for each day you gave me Maybe I don't know that much But I know this much is true I was blessed because I was loved by you You were always there for me The tender wind that carried me A light in the dark shinning your love into my life You've been my inspiraton Through the lies you were the truth My world is a better place because of you so thats pretty much the whole song. but its how i feel. he pretty much made everything in my life better, just knowing he loved me made everything bad good. he made me believe in myself, he made me feel beautiful. he made me feel like the best girl in the world. he helped me see things i never would have seen. and i thank him for that. everytime i listen to that song i cry. but its both a good and sad cry. its good because it reminds me of all the good times. and sad because of the bad times. god i love that boy. ♥ -Syd ps. I Miss You. Current Mood: A Little Of Everything (Comment on this)
Sunday, February 19th, 2006
10:59 am	SHOW! Feb-17-2006 alrighty, so i get up go to school, in a really good mood cant wait for the show right, get home bum around get money fer the show n such, than mark comes so we sit there watchin cartoons for about 5 mins then adam comes so we leave, pick up ash, get there around 6. i go in i see cody, than i look over his shoulder and who is there??? Mitch. so i was in a REALLY good mood, than im talking and i turn around and theres Damien i was liek YAY! so i was with people i love. than were watchin the Kickin' Throtes having a good time laughing at their Emo song, than Tysons band comes on, i turn around and see Shawn. who aparently wanted to yell at me, call me a whore a bitch a slut etc. but ash and his friend Nick were saying no just leave her alone, but i started crying in the middle of the show, and we went to the bathroom where i cried more, punched the wall broke my knuckle again, go back out sit in the hall while Lot 9 Brawl played, finally went back in for the last song and ash n Shawn were talking almost right behind me and i couldent stand it so i walked out again because i just dident need it at that time i mean my mood went from 100 goddamn percent doen to about negative 400. i was in a horrible mood. than he gave ash a piece of gum to give to me and she said he said "sorry i just cant do it, it hurts me too much, i want to be friends but i cant" and so i was like well its better than getting yelled at so i went back in to hear the Flaming Tsunamis, it was funn lotsa skanking n such. i got 3 guitar pics, one from Ethan the Bassist of the Tsunamis one from Greg the guitaris from the Tsunamis and one from Kirk the bassist for the Kickin' Throtes. and i got 2 Tsunamis patches. it was good. and the Tsunamis signed my vest which is cool. than we were in the lobby for quite some time and shawn walked by and gave me the peace sign with his fingers and i smiled. than we were waiting outside for Mitch's and Kaitlyns (sorry if i spelt get name wrong) ride to come. and he walked by again and gave the peace sign again so i gave it back and he called me over and i started crying and he said we can be friends and he hugged me and i was crying in his arms and he kissed the top of my head and said bye and i started crying again. and mitch gave me hugs to cheer me up which was nice. so than they left and Adam, Mark, Ash and I went to Tacobell got lost, screamed masterbation out a window, me n ash madeout in the back seat causing adam to crash almost 6 times. it all ended good so i suppose it was a good show. so yeah that was my night got home went on the computer. xx ♥ -Syd Current Mood: Still Iffy. (Comment on this)